"AAAH, i'm melting!"

*best read while listening to Aqua's "Barbie Girl"*

"I'm a barbie girl, in the barbie world..."

marvel at our plastic world!

hardly do we interact with real earth anymore. our cities and streets, our stores and our homes are all laying on our concrete world, "above" the lowly, dirty earth.

even our yards are plastic. sure, there's trees and grass and flowers and we have to do the occasional weeding, but everything is just so well manicured that it cant be called natural. we dont even let nature takes its course with our yards. we pay for these tiny little seeds all over our yard, water them, give them plastic to drink (lawn-juice) then dont even let them grow. every other week or so someone is payed to *VROOM-snip-snip.*

the leaves and branches that fall onto our lawns are gathered up and we pay someone to take them away, only to turn around and pay someone else to give us dead and chopped up leaves and branches called "mulch." what a funny world we live in.

our water's plastic. i dont just mean our bottled water, but our re-processed city water, too.

all of our food is plastic. most everything we eat comes in little cardboard and plastic packages, for our "convenience." what isnt plastic on the outside is plastic on the inside (well, even most plastic-packaged stuff is synthetic "food"). our vegetables, our fruits, our dairy and our meat are all genetically and chemically altered and assembly line delivered. that's pretty gross.

that's not even mentioning (until now, that is) our packaged plastic food for the person perpetually on the fast-paced plan (fast food)!

our bodies are plastic. *robot voice* i must take a shower every day! germs are bad! must smell good. nothing natural! new clothes and new clothes (even if they're bought to look old)! oh, is that hair dye? no, i'm doing something new and edgy and am going with my natural color! but of course, i must still put on my face, because the one i have isnt good enough, colorful enough, glittery enough, old enough (you pre-teens, you!) or young enough (*streeeeeeetch, staple, snip* i'm beautiful!).

this is what gets me, more than anything. even our mental states are "plastic"! feeling down? oh, that's bad, it's your right to be "happy"! take a plastic pill. can't sleep? take this plastic pill and never sleep naturally again! feeling sleepy? take this plastic drink!

of course that leads perfectly into a plastic spirituality. to be saved, pray a prayer. to be ok in life, go to church once a week. to be happy, read your Bible daily. whew, and that's too hard for most people. not feeling happy? pray for more! more what, you may ask? it doesnt really matter, does it, as long as it's more, right? God doesnt want us to have to suffer! Christ took all of our sufferings! so now i'll go about my day-to-day, worldly business and try to attain as much as i can in this life, be nice as often as i think about it (but not if i dont feel like it) and wait to be vanished out of here, away from the struggles of not being happy (which is all of our rights as Christians, but even more as free Americans. dang, i really try to hold back my sarcasm, i... it just... whatever).

[as a side note, praying recited prayers while contemplating on and drawing closer to Jesus through them is way too fake, plastic and ritualistic for any real Christian to even consider. to shame! hmm, now that i think about it, every religion in every culture since the beginning of time (both God's religion Judaism and Satan's religions All the Others) have all been "ritualistic." i wonder if there's any correlation to the mind-body-spirit connection, God's wisdom, Satan's mockery and ritual in religion? Nah, can't be. Jesus threw out ALL tradition and ritual when he threw out man-made traditions (i am curious, though, what godly Traditions were kept intact when all the others were thrown out with that statement? Any Protestants care to answer?).]

our happiness, that which we so earnestly strive after, is, of course, plastic. buy this to feel "happy." get that job and feel "good." not feeling good enough, yet? run away from life to a sports team, a new experience, alcohol, drugs, parties and sex! that'll do it! here's a good idea, be so utterly wrapped up in the plastic lives of celebrities and do what they do! be scandalous! spend frivolously, dont care about other people! hey, the 12" plastic dolls do it, why cant we standard 4 inch ones? oh, and care more about the celebrities lives and relationships then you do your own. that's the key to being plastic!

you can be my friend if you fit within these plastic parameters (the ones i fit in, of course). we will never talk about anything real, we'll just have plastic conversations about our plastic exteriors and use a magnifying glass to melt other plastic peoples' exteriors that dont match up to ours. whew, it's not easy being plastic. there's a lot of insignificant things to worry about!

"...Life in plastic, it's fantastic!"