OUCH!

this just struck me...

back in the day, baptism was only for Gentile, pagan converts into Judaism and THAT is why (at least in part) Jesus had to be baptized to fulfill all things. He came to abolish the division between Jews (God's people) and Gentiles (those outside of real relationship with God). In fulfilling all of the Law, He had to cover the bases for those who needed to enter into the Law in the first place.

just one more layer of understanding. Jesus rocks.

oh, glorious day!

yeah. i'm engaged. deal with it. just kidding.

so rhiannon and i are officially french, and by that, i mean we are fiancesesz. we're engaged. yeah yeah.

there we go.

that's right...!

so here i am, being welcomed into the Catholic church. that's what i'm talking about! have a good morning, everyone. i know i will!

no point in reposting...

so i'll just direct you to our ywam modesto team blog and you can read the glorious glory for yourself.

http://ywammodesto.blogspot.com/

yep

so in Christ, i'm free. more free than i give Christ credit. in Christ, i can be who i am made to be, which flows into doing what i'm made to do. no guilt, no questions. so who am i and what am i made to do?

wow, you didnt make it easy on me for this one, did'ja?

i am a son of God; i have the right, the power, the authority, to become a child of God. Christ emptied Himself to the point of being a speck of a man; i empty myself to be Divine. crazy.

even now, i am a Warrior Priest. Christ was/is, so why not me? i am to fight for the world around me to usher them into the Presence of God-- tough-loving reconciliation.

i am a word, a syllable, within the Eternal Word Who resonates through the infinite expanse of space/time. i am a bearer of, a witness to and a protector for the Truth. i am a light of truth that dispels the darkness, depravity and death of Deceit (say that 29 times fast).

ok, so what does all that look like. what do i "do"?

i live virtuously. i am the edible fruit of love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. mmmm, and i'm delectable.

i'm to stand up for Truth and Justice. i need to speak into people's lives (as relationship allows, but not always). "hey, good job." "dont do that!" "are you thinking clearly on this?"

i'm supposed to write. what? writing is a part of my ministry and service to God and Our People? sure! God gave me the gift of ability and joy of writing. use it for His Glory. so taking a class on writing to develop the skill is a part of that, too! pretty sweet.

along with writing comes reading and studying-- put plainly, learning. i love learning. that's my first passion. teaching is my second. but i love learning! so learn for the sake of the Kingdom!

prayer. i am to pray. i am to spend time in the Presence of Our Father. hey, Christ died so i could, so i better! it's humbling, and God knows i need to be humbled.

along with learning and praying, there's getting into the Word. Written, Oral and Magisterial. that's where Christ is. and to know God through Jesus is Eternal Life. so yeah.

that's a little about me.

officially official

you heard it first here, folks. i'm officially official YWAM. the proof is in the pudding.... or, more accurately, on the YWAM Modesto website. check out my page on http://www.ywammodesto.org and click on John's page (on the left-hand side). ah yeah!

why, oh why

how is it that we ever let ourselves go without a real Sabbath's rest? God knew what He was doing when He required us to chill out from time to time. silence and solitude mixed in with a li'l R&R. that's what i'm talking about!

in case you arent aware, i just got back from a few days at a monastery, the Abbey of New Clairvaux, up in Vina, past Chico. beautiful landscape, beautiful atmosphere, beautiful time. *hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh* (sigh of true relief).

so who's ready for more of life, heh?

see it

i just want everyone to know that jet li's "fearless" is a really, really, REALLY good movie.

well, hey, that's GREAT!

the Gospel! the Good News!

what's so new about having an afterlife of bliss and happiness? isnt that what every religion, to one degree or another, claims to give folks? so what's the big deal with Christianity? why did Christ, God, Who knew what all these other religions had to say, come down here just to tell us about a glorious afterlife?

"Here's the Good News, folks! straight from God Himself! here it is: there's an afterlife and you only got to believe in me to get there! great, huh?! yeah! oh sure, the other guys have an afterlife, too, but theirs isnt real. mine is the real afterlife, complete with worshiping me for the rest of eternity! woo!"

i'd call that "Decent Old-Hat Story."

the Good News is that we can live, now, the Way we were intended to-- in Real, Right Relationship with each other and God. we've been given the right and the authority to know God (eternal life, John17.3) and to live like Him, as Him, NOW. not later, not after, but fully, completely NOW. here. now. henow.

we can bring this "afterlife" this "Paradise" to the present moment in this present space. we can turn this unreality into Reality. it's our right and our privilege. Pure Truth, Fully Alive. US! it's good, it's new, it's Good News!

who else is talking about redeeming the physical world and taking care of it? who else is talking about justice for the weak, hurt and oppressed? who else is more concerned with the person over there that we dont know and might even be afraid of than he is for himself? who else is willing to leave "brothers and sisters and mothers and fathers and fields" and self for the sake of ushering every person, creature and aspect of space/time into the Presence of God? who else but Jesus Christ and those whom He indwells?

"EXTRA! EXTRA! READ ALL ABOUT IT! CHRISTIANITY-- NOT YOUR SAME OLD SHIT!"

"is that one of those pyramid schemes?"

yep. it sure is. it's called "the world." i'm sure you're well acquainted.

so we want political change. we want the world to be a better place. we want the leaders to pass laws that protect human rights, out-law abortion and make people happy! riiiiiiiiiight.

that's the way of the world. effecting change from the top down.

i'm not saying don't be political, dont vote (if you like wasting your time, vote. but that's another topic for another time), dont write your congressman. sure, do all that.

but we are not of the world, are we?

God's ways are always a bit (read as, completely) bass-ackwards from the worlds'.

so what does God's way, the Way of Truth towards Life, the Way of the Kingdom of God, look like? it starts from the ground up.

no law can change hearts. hell, if God's Law couldnt do it (read the Epistles) then ours sure as H aint gonna do it. there's only one thing that changes the heart of man and only one way to do it. if you want a man's, a nation's, heart to change, to see and appreciate and fight for life, it's gotta be done by the Holy Spirit and He can only work through Right Relationships.

no matter what the law is, someone wont have an abortion if they see a baby inside. no matter what the government tells us about one "non-human" or another, we wont kill and rape and pillage and bomb if we see them as fellow human beings that Christ died for. no matter what college does or doesnt tell you about ethical business practices, we wont screw people over or buy from corporations that ruin lives, if we respect life.

that can only come by the Holy Spirit's conviction and teaching in a person's heart through RIGHT, REAL RELATIONSHIP.

we gotta work from the bottom up. we got to love the people around us. we got to act with integrity, deal honestly, work hard, do justly, love mercy, fight for innocence, speak truth and share life. if we do that, the Life and Kingdom and Kingship of Christ will spread like WildFire through this dark land (no, not just the United States, but thanks for having my back on that one!).

then, no matter what the (or any) government tells us is not ok, we will still do. life, and that purchased by Christ, cannot be stopped. the government will have no power to get us to perpetrate evil as long as we commit ourselves to doing good.

that's freedom, that's peace.


that's the kind of sound pyramidal structure i'd like to be a part of. (what kind of a sentence was that?).

ok, so...

i have 2 blogs that are in "draft" mode right now and a bunch of other things that are "works in progress" on my computer, so i feel a little guilty about this, but i decided i'd still get this out there.

so, without further ado...

5 ADVANTAGES OF BEING HOMELESS!!! YEA!

1. you'll never have to worry about putting your in-laws up after a surprise visit!

2. no telemarketers can hassle you about reducing your monthly mortgage payments.

3. neighbor kids wont be hitting baseballs through your window any time soon (you might want to wear a helmet, though).

4. no more jury-duty, anyone?!

5. it's a great way to meet homeless chicks.

in the style of best/worst/top list things, i made sure these were especially terrible. aaron, you can hit me later.

not your typical rebellYAWN

That which is lying deep within is crying out to be free from sin God's Image inside has been reborn; from Death your soul is completely torn The Real Revolution is in what we do; Rebel against what's killing you

S... O...

N of God! Woo!

so as a man, i share in the Fatherhood of God. it is my responsibility and my honor to take ownership and care of the world around me-- to protect innocence, fight for justice, teach truth and share life.

i share in the Fatherhood of Christ Who does as He sees His Father do.

i am the bridgebuilder, the bushwhacker, the reconciler, the priest for Creation and creatures, man, woman and child, for enemy and oppressed, friends and family back into Reality, Eternal Life-- back to right relationship with Our Father through Jesus Christ of Nazareth by the Power of the Holy Spirit with the "Great Cloud of Witnesses"-- Our Blessed Mother (we have to be "born" of the Spirit somehow, right?) and all the Saints together with all the Angels as fellow servants and worshipers of God. ah yeah.

so.... who's your daddy!

True Freedom

is unadulterated, selfless mercy through humble, faithful obedience to our Father.

chew on that for a bit

"AAAH, i'm melting!"

*best read while listening to Aqua's "Barbie Girl"*

"I'm a barbie girl, in the barbie world..."

marvel at our plastic world!

hardly do we interact with real earth anymore. our cities and streets, our stores and our homes are all laying on our concrete world, "above" the lowly, dirty earth.

even our yards are plastic. sure, there's trees and grass and flowers and we have to do the occasional weeding, but everything is just so well manicured that it cant be called natural. we dont even let nature takes its course with our yards. we pay for these tiny little seeds all over our yard, water them, give them plastic to drink (lawn-juice) then dont even let them grow. every other week or so someone is payed to *VROOM-snip-snip.*

the leaves and branches that fall onto our lawns are gathered up and we pay someone to take them away, only to turn around and pay someone else to give us dead and chopped up leaves and branches called "mulch." what a funny world we live in.

our water's plastic. i dont just mean our bottled water, but our re-processed city water, too.

all of our food is plastic. most everything we eat comes in little cardboard and plastic packages, for our "convenience." what isnt plastic on the outside is plastic on the inside (well, even most plastic-packaged stuff is synthetic "food"). our vegetables, our fruits, our dairy and our meat are all genetically and chemically altered and assembly line delivered. that's pretty gross.

that's not even mentioning (until now, that is) our packaged plastic food for the person perpetually on the fast-paced plan (fast food)!

our bodies are plastic. *robot voice* i must take a shower every day! germs are bad! must smell good. nothing natural! new clothes and new clothes (even if they're bought to look old)! oh, is that hair dye? no, i'm doing something new and edgy and am going with my natural color! but of course, i must still put on my face, because the one i have isnt good enough, colorful enough, glittery enough, old enough (you pre-teens, you!) or young enough (*streeeeeeetch, staple, snip* i'm beautiful!).

this is what gets me, more than anything. even our mental states are "plastic"! feeling down? oh, that's bad, it's your right to be "happy"! take a plastic pill. can't sleep? take this plastic pill and never sleep naturally again! feeling sleepy? take this plastic drink!

of course that leads perfectly into a plastic spirituality. to be saved, pray a prayer. to be ok in life, go to church once a week. to be happy, read your Bible daily. whew, and that's too hard for most people. not feeling happy? pray for more! more what, you may ask? it doesnt really matter, does it, as long as it's more, right? God doesnt want us to have to suffer! Christ took all of our sufferings! so now i'll go about my day-to-day, worldly business and try to attain as much as i can in this life, be nice as often as i think about it (but not if i dont feel like it) and wait to be vanished out of here, away from the struggles of not being happy (which is all of our rights as Christians, but even more as free Americans. dang, i really try to hold back my sarcasm, i... it just... whatever).

[as a side note, praying recited prayers while contemplating on and drawing closer to Jesus through them is way too fake, plastic and ritualistic for any real Christian to even consider. to shame! hmm, now that i think about it, every religion in every culture since the beginning of time (both God's religion Judaism and Satan's religions All the Others) have all been "ritualistic." i wonder if there's any correlation to the mind-body-spirit connection, God's wisdom, Satan's mockery and ritual in religion? Nah, can't be. Jesus threw out ALL tradition and ritual when he threw out man-made traditions (i am curious, though, what godly Traditions were kept intact when all the others were thrown out with that statement? Any Protestants care to answer?).]

our happiness, that which we so earnestly strive after, is, of course, plastic. buy this to feel "happy." get that job and feel "good." not feeling good enough, yet? run away from life to a sports team, a new experience, alcohol, drugs, parties and sex! that'll do it! here's a good idea, be so utterly wrapped up in the plastic lives of celebrities and do what they do! be scandalous! spend frivolously, dont care about other people! hey, the 12" plastic dolls do it, why cant we standard 4 inch ones? oh, and care more about the celebrities lives and relationships then you do your own. that's the key to being plastic!

you can be my friend if you fit within these plastic parameters (the ones i fit in, of course). we will never talk about anything real, we'll just have plastic conversations about our plastic exteriors and use a magnifying glass to melt other plastic peoples' exteriors that dont match up to ours. whew, it's not easy being plastic. there's a lot of insignificant things to worry about!

"...Life in plastic, it's fantastic!"

YES!

despite all my cynicism.... PEOPLE CARE!!! i dont know if you've ever seen the Invisible Children movie. wow. it's hardcore. it's about children who are orphaned and/or forced to runaway so that they wont be KIDNAPPED and FORCED to kill for one warlord or another in Uganda, Africa. man, it gets to me just remembering it. anyway, at the encouragement of a friend (thanks, Rhiannon) i went to invisiblechildren.com and there's a video showing 20-something people--it doesnt even have clips from the movie--going out for a tour for awareness.

seeing people actually RALLYING for JUSTICE really freakin excites me. i got all teary-eyed passionate just watching these "young adults" (what a bullshit term that's used to keep those of us in our prime down) jump around (the music sure helped incite emotion, too). thank God for people.

anyway, check out this specific video i'm talking about and others at http://www.invisiblechildren.com/theMovie/media/index.php?mediaID=1003816137

pearl

Grace is the participation of the very Presence of God

Mother Angelica

right now i am given the grace (and thereby, the faith and strength) to love and honor God and to just be His friend-- to be with Him. thank You for that, Lord

(in case you dont notice, i fixed the quote to be verbatim)

i hear another rap coming on....

this endless search is taking its toll
another drop of poison to kill my soul
this search is raging outta control
try another hollow thing to fill this hole

the real me is lying dead inside
hidden very well by this zombie's pride
why cant that be thing that's died?
cant hear me over the deadman's chide

i just gotta turn back to the Source
see my Savior comin' on His White Horse
live by His Strength He'll endorse
make that deadman ruin his drawers!

so when i feel the need to run
just remember that i'm God's son
He loves me 'til the Day is done
by His Life my victory's won!

all i can do

i'll never know myself enough and i can never know my heart. God does. do what i need to do, as i feel led, as i know is right, and give it to God. "i dont know my heart, but whatever it is, i give this to You, so regardless of my ulterior motives and intentions, You are still glorified."

social justice, go!

if we just sit around a table, drinking our sophisticated coffee, discussing the world's complex social issues, while being extra sophisticated (because we're college students and all [a junior college still counts, right?]), then we're effecting a change and making a difference in the world, right? ...Right?

isolation

i went all day today without a single human interaction. oh sure, i saw and talked with people, but i was always the funny, sarcastic, flirty guy or i was the drink order/maker guy or i was the salesman or i was the employee and i only talked to the boss, the customer, the friendly customer, the "girls i work with." see, no human to human interaction. just one facade or "mode" briefly engaging another out of desire or circumstance. wow, a whole day and i didnt see anyone and no one saw me. hell, i didnt even see me.

and that's exactly what is required of us these days. nothing. i can turn on employee mode, do what needs to get done, drive to the atm, get my "hard earned" money, go to the mcdonald's drive thru, order to a voice, exchange money with a money changer, get my food from food giver, go "home" and be entertained by tv personalities.

often times we make it easier on ourselves as well by putting a mode on someone, no matter how real they're trying to be. we only have to interact with our projection of someone and save ourselves the trouble of caring about them and their situation and life.

so forget about being considerate or loving. if i'm not me and i dont see anyone for who they are then what's to care about? "i wont put back the magazine i was looking it, someone else will," "oh, my mom will clean my room for me," "why clear my plate, someone gets paid to," "i'm a paying customer, so my drink has to be ready NOW, even though i'm going to be hanging out in the store for another hour and half," "why doesnt that bum just get a job-- he's getting no hand-outs from me!" nothing's required of us!

the 2 worst, i think, are when children get abused (even just ignoring them is abuse-- knowing you're loved is necessary for development and life!) and stripping the dignity from women and turning them into prostitutes. and you dont have to have sex with them to do that. Jesus said that looking lustfully at a woman is as having committed adultery with her. so basically, you just raped her.

the human condition. and we're all to blame.

repentance-- confession, contrition and penance. i'll be the first to admit that i treat people like shit. i hate it. but it's so easy! if you are in my life to any degree, i've used and abused you. i want to be sorry, but to be sorry means to make up for it and to do better. so not only is abusing easy, but being real is hard.

i guess the question is, what's the trade off? what do we get out of being real and sincere and considerate (especially when it takes so much effort, like telling a friend something they arent going to want to hear or serving someone who really just deserves a crack in the mouth)?

we get to be ourselves. or at least, that's what i'm told. if i give in to all my selfish, shallow desires, i'm an animal-- nothing more. if i feed the other dog, as it were, i'm letting Christ live through me. maybe the real Real Me doesnt get a chance until we shed this mortal coil. "whoever loses his life for My sake will find it."

so where does that leave me? i want to want to but i dont want to. the ol' "suck it up, princess" adage seems fitting at this point. i guess that's when we know it's true love for Christ-- to love people when we know how much it can suck.

why does it have to be the little things that matter? if i could just do grand acts of kindness i'd be good to go.

boy, is a fake life easy, but i kinda hate it. i only say kinda b/c it sure is easier.

hmm.

the rest of the story...

so things didnt work out exactly as we expected them to, but our time rocked just the same.

we started on a little known trail, Pohono, hiked a distance of just about 4 miles with an approx. 2100 ft vertical gain. yeah. intense. i'm really impressed with myself in being able to read the map as far as altitude and finding water goes. jimmy, by the way, is a natural at finding water by reading his environment.

we camped at a place called stanford point, about 300 feet below our peak for the trip, next to meadow brook. we had a gorgeous view overlooking the valley, with some falls off in the distance. really cool. jengish took a picture or 2 at about sunset. you can read about his perspective by going to his blog (hint, there's a link on the side of my page --->).

it was a hard time. i was getting down on myself for needing so many breaks on the way up, not giving myself grace for the intensity of the climb and the fact that i've done nothing physical since the end of the lecture phase of my dts (in november) and have gained 2 inches on my waist since february (i lost a bit of that after this trip). on the way down the next day i realized how intense it really was (ignoring the numbers i already knew) and decided to go easy on myself.

i built the fire the night we were there and jimmy built it in the morning. we woke up wet from the frost during the night. the fire was a welcome guest in the morning (the only reason i was able to get out of my sleeping bag).

we dined during the trip on... food bars and string cheese. yep. from right after lunch to right before the next day, that was our diet. we all brought our own bars, jimmy brought the cheese (and had no problem cutting it, either) and i stumbled upon an interesting new thing when i was at the store the previous day. right under the energy bars in target there was a box of "sport bean jelly belly's." i figured if i dont try them now, i never will. something just didnt seem right about them. well, on the trail, they're actually pretty good-- tasty and nutritious (based on the fact that they taste like sweet vitamins). yeah. would i buy them again? yeah, maybe, if my budget allows, but real food first, next time.

yeah, i forgot that since we would be below 9600 feet we could have fires, meaning we could cook real food. oh well. the bars carried us through.

so what things did we talk about and what spiritual lessons did God reveal? you'll have to come next time to find out. that's actually just an easy way to say i dont remember. just kidding.

maybe you'll hear about some ideas we covered in upcoming blogs.... who knows?

peace out side (and it is!)

oh, come to the church in the wild....

that's what i'm talking about!

i will be unavailable over the next 40 hours or so b/c i'm going to yosemite with jengish and jimmy. yeah, u heard me right. dont be jealous. ok, fine. u can be a little bit jealous.

i planned a trail, starting at about 8.5k feet which climbs about 1500 ft over a 4-5 mile distance. not too bad. at the top of the hike are a cluster of lakes, aptly called Ten Lakes. that's where i plan to reside for the night.

should be awesome. not too much of a hike, kinda intense elevation gain, plenty of beautiful landscape to explore once we make it to the lakes, i get to wear (and hopefully use!) my new knife w/o looking like a dork and i get to spend some quality time with jimmy, jengish and my loving Father.

there's this awesome quote by john muir (famous trail blazer, especially in the sierra nevada range) that goes something along the lines of even the most bored, overworked and over stressed city folk find they come home when they come to the mountains. works for me. it's what they call God's country, a-hee-huck. P-tew-- BING.

life

or something like it

the other day i sat through the harsh reality of the lives of some kids that we visit every week. i'm still reeling and processing and waiting for my heart to completely shatter.

a quick run-down-- a 9 year old boy cant read, cant write, cant add and even has trouble speaking. the good thing is he just started school. the bad thing is he's already at least 2 years behind and with the way our "education" system is, he'll never catch up. add on top of all of that a family life that is lacking. parents who arent present, grandparents who dont give a ffff (and liberally use that word in his presence) and no one who cares to spend time with him, tell him he's good, teach him how to live or even how to function.

i'm realizing more and more, or becoming more and more aware, of the simplicity of NOW, more precisely, HERE AND NOW. i am right now. this is the gift God has given me. my gift back to Him is me right here. in this moment, in this place, what can i do to honor God and show the world Who He is?

i thank God that He's helping me become more and more aware of His Presence in and around me and the simple fact that i am exactly where He wants me to be a light for Him. i'm at borders because, at the least, there is one believer who doesnt know what it means to believe. there's another girl who used to weigh 180 pounds and weighs what she weighs now b/c of diet drugs. another girl is a lesbian. another has abandoned her faith. one guy doesnt know how to interact with human beings and another guy doesnt know how to be one. what other reason can God have me at borders than to share Him with them as He's has shared Himself with me?

the same holds true for this little family with these forgotten children. if i dont remember them, who will? if i wont affirm them, who will? if i dont show them that love is more powerful than any "spell" or skill or drug or problem or situation or pain, who will?

ah, and here's the clincher. i can't. i can't be the one. Jesus Christ, through me, can, if i let Him, if i ask Him to and trust Him as He does, as He leads, whatever it takes to release Him.

see, life is pretty simple.

sola faulte

where's the faith in no Real Presence, baptism being symbolic, Christ unable to forgive sins through a priest (sharing His Real Power and Calling and Ministry), the Body being only spiritual, there's no real authority to face except the Bible (which we can interpret to fit our needs, "as the Holy Spirit leads"), works not being a part of salvation (no one is saying Grace is taken out of it, we are given the Grace to have faith just as much as we're given the Grace to work for God's glory), pretribulational rapture ("whew, glad i dont have to face that!"), etc. also, fit somewhere in here, america's money and the people's wealth and the lack of faith b/c of our "rich man" condition (our poorest poor in the top 76 percentile of THE WORLD)-- no real faith b/c no real need-- "america makes us free"

faith alone!
is what we hail
but have we stopped to consider
how that might fail?

faith is really
a complete trust
God, You are Who You are
and that's enough!

that's all well and good
but do we take Him at His Word?
it seems we've stripped the Life
from all these things we've heard

"I'll be with you always"
and "live like I do"
but if you live by Tradition
there's a hex on you

"die to self,
be raised in My Life"
but not by water
that's just an idea, all right?

"I send you out
in the way I was"
but only God can forgive sins
the same pharisee-tical fuss

what's the risk
in once and always saved?
we can sin as we choose!
we can't catch blame!

it doesnt take faith
to be free from works
just believe, man,
dont act like a jerk

when we take the Physical
out of the Body
there's no need for real unity;
our theology's then blotty

how can the world
see Christ in us
when we choose to not even
ride the same bus?

Christ's disciples didnt walk
b/c symbols are hard to accept
Jesus gave us Himself,
His Broken Body in Bread

and we westerners
have it all wrong
why would God choose just us
to save from harm?

what i mean by that
is the pre-trib rap--
what about the world's Christians
who, in Christ, bear the world's flack?

where's the faith
in living off our money?
how often are we in the position
where we have to be running

putting our faith
in the promise of God
simply bear our sufferings
with a trusting nod

the biggest lack of faith
in sola fide
is not having to do
what anyone else would say

well, that's how you see it
but not me
i'll interpret this myself, thanks,
because in Christ, i'm free

that's not Christ's love
to not give us a guide
the Apostles and Peter
what, would Christ lie?

i think we need
to trust God enough
that He gave us a way
to call the world's bluff

God isnt dead
and Christ hasn't left
and let's just put
all of our doubts to rest--

as a child doesnt understand
but will trust his father
these hard-to-swallows
are really gifts from our Lover

it's not as bad as you think

"look, the other day, i intentionally lied because i just really didnt want to hang out with you. i'm sorry. that was selfish and rude. what are you doing this weekend? let's go out and i'm going to buy you a beer."

that's indulgence. righting a wrong and making up for it (willingly accepting a deserved punishment before it's dished out).

a little reminder

well, to me anyway. stop reading. seriously. stop. this isnt for u.

the pocket thomas merton
new seeds pocket classics
merton
robert inchausti

ah yeah

the eMpTy V generation

"You're a bum, Traveras!"

funny. i thought the term "bum" was reserved for people with no class, no decency and no respectability. in the little time these guys were in my life, they fit that description pretty well.

first, a definition, taken from myself (i'm so clever!). an MTV: a head with no original thought (that is, other-than-spoon-fed, personal ideas), a heart void of compassion and non-existent moral fiber encased by a person with no integrity, no conscience, no sense of justice and no strength to live life for the poor, weak and helpless; someone with a lack of respect for anything respectable and respect given only to the despicable; an all-talk showboat living a shallow existence. an empty V. and our society's full of 'em.

we went to a san francisco giants game a couple nights ago and there were a few DB's behind us. it all started with them harassing some old guy who was wearing a Dodgers jacket. all of a sudden, a label is more important than the human wearing it (sounds an awful lot like "infant"ries and the murder/rape/pillaging/killing they do in the name of their respective country. hmm). jenish, the kyrgyz man with a heart of gold (one day, he'll have teeth of gold, too. just like all the other kyrgyz i know!) stood up for the elder man, asking these guys to cool it.

the really cool thing is that these guys respected jenish's polite request, apologized to the gentlemen then continued to enjoy themselves at the game with their whooping and hollering in the name of their team, all while keeping it clean and respectable.

wow, life would be awesome if people would actually be people, huh?

no, these guys didnt stop. it just escalated. a friend of ours got a little tougher with these guys and did they man up and accept the challenge? no, they resorted to crude humor, never actually directed to my friend, b/c then they'd be in trouble. no, it was just about him, doing the "we're not actually doing anything wrong," thing. wow. V with a capital "vvvvvvv."

so my friend got the chance to grow in his patience (a gift from above, without a doubt [1Thess5.18]), jenish got to experience the up and coming generation hailing from the "best country in the world" (isnt that what we're calling it these days?) and i got my heart for humanity (especially this country) challenged. Lord, please help this turn into insightful compassion. i'm lost to cynicism and even bitterness if it's not.

so, just a quick blurb. it makes me sad. thank God He's my Hope and i dont have to trust in or rely on anything in this world b/c it would all count for naught (that's not counting believers. they are a part of God, being the Body of Christ and all. it just sucks when we act like the world. that's another blog for another time, but thanks for being interested). pray for me and pray for us believers and pray for america and pray for western culture and pray for the world.

that pretty much sums it up!

b/c america isn't what makes us free...

I

In America
Christ only says, “forgiven!”
The idea that we’re
“cleansed from past sin”

But it’s more than just
A slate wiped clean;
It’s an end to slavery
A chance to be your true being

For me, the thoughts of others
Shape my actions
“What’ll they think of this?”
So the real me never happens

It’s also true for people
Who impose on others
“Hey, listen to me”
In their own selves smothered

Either way,
It’s something to prove.
One mask or another
So the real you doesn’t shine through

“I’m so cool,
People are lucky to know me,”
Or “I’m a screw up”
And other self-loathings

On one hand
The good qualities overshadowed by arrogance
or negative narcissism
Doesn’t give them a chance

The damage done
When we lust
Hurts those alone
And those who find luck

The mind expects all women
To open wide
That’s a lot of pressure
Just because a chick walked by!

And this goes out
To battle shyness
Look past their bodies
And try seeing their kindness

Guess what?
Then you wont be a pushover
You wont be a lapdog
In futile attempts to be her lover

The next step, of course,
For the trap of lust
Is taking advantage
Of someone’s body and trust

Women believe their beauty
Is their body as art.
They don’t even get a chance
To see their own heart

“You’re not pretty enough
And you don’t put out”
This barrage has caused
A moral draught

Humans only want
Their hearts accepted
But now both you and she
Are getting STD tested

Now let’s discuss we who need
Heart approval
Screamed by those captives of drugs
Or of being physically brutal

“Look at me,
I use self-medication”
Or whose attention-seeking
Has lead to killing, by escalation

These actions and attitudes
Are easily hooked
By the slave master Compensation
According to my psych-book

On a related topic,
The jailor Hate
How can anyone enslaved by this
Be so great?

“I’m mad because
You offended me!
You stepped on the toes
Of this human being!

“But wait,
Aren’t you human too?
It’s not like I’m great enough
To change the sky from blue.

“And think about all
The people I’ve crossed.
A penny I’ll pay for each-
Who could count the cost?”

When I hate
Or someone’s made me mad
I run their death
Over and over in my head

So if this was my world,
I’d give in to killing,
But, I mean really,
That’s not at all fulfilling

It’s always nice
To bring a smile
Or lighten the load
During a proverbial mile

So if you no longer
Wish to be captive
Then turn to the One
Who can let you live

He’s the One
Who heals the broken-hearted
And the One where
True Life started

It’s no longer
“me” or pride
But Christ, Who,
In my heart abides

It’s living in love,
Living for each other
Freedom for me
Not to be undercover

It’s more than just
A slate wiped clean
He’s the end of slavery,
The chance to be your true being

comb eunit tea

i was at a community garden down in the airport district-- one place where we do the "bread line" on thursday. it was ONE DAY, a coming together of high school church groups doing service projects all over our fair Modesto. we were doing some hardcore "maintenance" work with Chris, Aaron and our ONE youth student James (that's what ONE DAY meant, right?) with another church, Laloma Grace Brethren. it was cool, it was hard, it was awesome, and it was beautiful coming together in the Lord.

oh, and Calvary Temple (i think) was there also, doing their own thing, which was also awesome. they had some people handing out food, others playing games and some guy talking to a group of the kids over a PA system.

the man said something that struck some kind of chord in me. he was talking to the kids about their "bad" friends. you know, the ones that want u to do bad things with them. there was such an emphasis on doing the right thing, despite ur bad friends (which is an important thing to live by). he was saying that your walk with Christ is up to you to live out, "despite your friends."

it got me to thinking about my past and how and why i am where i am. yes, i needed to go against the flow of my druggie friends (really, i had to drop them, which i did). but what took so long for me to "go against the flow"? b/c that was the focus. "drop your bad friends and do what you need to do." how come i couldnt?

i had people supporting me in my growth, telling me what i should and shouldn't do, to do or not do these things despite my feelings, despite my friends. but nothing happened; nothing changed. nothing happened until i had other friends, if u will (i did!).

COMMUNITY! this is the very exact precise specific reason that the Body of Christ is more than just a Spiritual Body. people, man. people. we need people. "no man's an island," right? how much more true is that than in the hardest, but most fulfilling, path than the Way?

we're reminded that "a chain is as strong as its weakest link." i say, "you're as strong as your community." think about it. when i'm struggling with sin, i confess it and am encouraged and guided through it. when i'm hurting, i got people to pour my heart out to. when i'm excited, i got people to share it with. when i'm lost, i got people who care to set me straight. I'M NEVER ALONE. that's all there is to it.

the difference between then and way back then is community! in the past, i got encouraging words, a few free lunches, all that. but when i had people walking side-by-side with me on a daily (or nearly so) basis, i started to live life the way it was supposed to be lived. i had a reason to live! i had people who cared about me and people i cared to live with (that's nothing against the family and friends that were there for me before, it's just how it was, how i was feeling).

have u read that Scripture where Christ is saying, in not so many words (well, more, i think), that "if you leave everything u have (family, friends, possessions, jobs, life) I will give you all that 100 times over now and later (Heaven, ah yeah!)." if you are willing to leave your worldly relationships God will bless you with REAL relationships! He will teach you how to truly love and live with people, in all its difficult-ass transparency (Waka, waka). i've got closer friends than i've ever had. i'm closer to my family than i've ever been. I CARE ABOUT PEOPLE. yeah, me. i know. crazy.

anyway, i lost my train of thought, or inspiration, or whatever, so that's that for now. this deserves more attention than i'm giving it, but yeah. you're as strong as your community. dive in. fall in love with the blessing of people around you! pour out your heart and receive theirs! live the way we were supposed to, in right relationship with God and with each other.

didnt know i was a poet, did ya?

aside from the recent spiritual adage i came up with ("screw it, just do it!"), i also write more traditional poems. this was a poem/song-that-didnt-get-nailed-down-to-music that i wrote sometime shortly after joining up with the guys. i remember it was the night before we got the new van. and i'm also aware that i post too many blogs too close together. what can i say, there's a lot on my mind. deal with it.

and without any further adieu (i assume that's french...)

Welcome to the Shiva
No money no honey, no chicken no curry
C’mon, it’s only 20 bucks and I’m in a hurry
I smoked my chrys and I got my rock
Hope there’s enough that they’ll open the lock…
…to my motel

I got what you need and you need what I got.
Help ignore the pain and help your brain rot
I only know the streets and how to survive
High on my supply; I need to stay alive…
…so I sell

Don’t go to school, my only friend is a beetle
I found him outside by another used needle
My parents party all night and sleep all day
I really just wish someone would take us away…
… from this hell

Did you give me a shoulder, something to cry on?
How ‘bout food when you knew I was starvin’?
Did you feed My sheep or love My lost?
Didn’t think you had to, that I was just…
…a “good deal”?

everything i write or whatever is all a work-in-progress. maybe one day, after Jimmy helps me put a beat to the rap i recently wrote, he'll help me make this an actual song and also put the blues riff i have in mind to this. i wonder if i can put songs on blogspot? that would be interesting...

dish wash nation?

oh, dispensation! i was sorely... mistaken there... wasnt i, a-hmm hmm.

quick idea... dispensationalism: "As a current in Protestant Christian theology, dispensationalism is a form of premillennialism which teaches biblical history as a number of successive economies or administrations, called dispensations, each of which emphasizes the discontinuity of the Old Testament covenants God made with His various people." (Dispensationalism. Wikipedia. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dispensationalism. bolds mine). BUT, we all know that Christ didn't come to abolish the Law, but to fulfill it (Mt5.17).

so what does that mean? well, if the Old Testament Temple and Laws were a shadow of the spiritual, and Christ completed them, doesnt it make sense that He would still share these gifts, after they have attained their true power and Life, especially since we are now, like Him, both physical and spiritual?

what am i talking about? well, Old Testament covenants being united with Christ and given to us as the Sacraments. we all agree that He wouldnt give us something physical void of spiritual life and virtue (for example, the Bible isn't just a book, but His Written Word), but, again, since we are still Man, it just makes sense that He would impart spiritual gifts through physical means. We are human and He (having been made Man), knows what it is to walk in both worlds, as we do now.

i'm not saying one way or the other that we have to receive and practice all the Sacraments for life, i'm just saying that God, being the same yesterday, today and forever, continues to impart Himself (now completely!) through Sacred Tradition, the fulfilled/completed OT covenants, the Sacraments.

now, back to dish wash nation... i think tha.......

ok, chris!

it's about hi-time u told me how to put people on the side of my blogpage (like "John in Ripon, Jimmy in Salida") and tell me how u get ur pics online. i just dont know.

God left us

wait, is that what Gabriel told Mary? is that what Mt1.23 says? oh wait. no. Immanuel. "God with us." so why would Christ come and go? why would He make the most profound military attack in all of Creation, promise to lead us into all Truth and to be with us until the end of the age, then high-tail it outta here? why would He tell us He loves us so much that He would die for us, then leave us on our own to figure this life (and even Him) out?

yes, He gave us His Spirit, yes, He gave us His Written Word, but how is that any different than what He did for mankind through the Jews previously? Isn't the awesome love of God exemplified by Him descending from heaven to live side-by-side with us, teaching and growing and loving and leading us? isn't Jesus' Great Work to redeem mankind and restore us to God? didn't He unite us-- who we are-- with Divinity? does our humanness count for nothing anymore?

if so, why don't we just POP! out of the physical when we become Christians? what's the point of living life on this earth anymore?

i think our physical selves do count for something. i think God made Man and loves Man and works to reconcile Man to Himself. He can't love us if He hates what He made us. Yes, our flesh has been corrupted by our own doing and we need to be purified and purged of selfishness and division, but we are still Man and God still cares about our physical selves (why else would He desire so desperately for us to care for the hungry, naked, poor and help-/defenseless?) and our broken selves will eventually give way to our glorified bodies (in the style of our Risen Lord, Jesus Christ).

so this brings us to a Physical Church (because we are still physical even though the Spirit of God has given us new life) where God Himself teaches and guides us and explains Himself to us when we just dont understand. again, we believers, His Body, have to be physically united as long as we are physical creatures (it just makes sense) and He promised to teach us Truth. how does He do that? how does He teach us if He is not with us as we are (His Spirit and Sacred Scripture are not living, breathing people)?

it's simple, really. He ascended to the Right Hand of the Father, but not before anointing His peeps to live in His stead. not just teach, not just talk about, but to live in place of Him. He gave us the Magisterium! His Apostles speak His Words, perform His Acts and live by His Spirit. Heck, they wrote the New Testament, dont you think what they did would count for something as far as what we should do goes? doesnt it make sense that, since, "those who hear [them] hear [Him]," their teachings would be pretty perfect?

and why would their teaching end with them? well, it doesnt. 2Tim2.2 "And the things you have heard me say in the presence of many witnesses entrust to reliable men who will also be qualified to teach others." succession! four tiers of succession in that verse alone. and that's not a new thing as Mt23.2 shows us. and v.3 shows us that, NO MATTER WHAT, we have to do what His successors tell us to do.

when i was struggling with the idea of God, and especially when i was a fallen believer too scared to come back, i would cry, cry, cry to Jesus, asking for Him to make Himself physically present to me so i could just talk to Him. i would plead, "You were a man! You know what it is to need a face to talk to and a person to touch! please!" i found that He later answered that prayer by bringing ywam modesto and new hope to me, specifically through Jimmy, as my Confessor and mentor.

James says to confess our sins, one to another (Jm5.16) and we're told elsewhere to encourage each other daily (Heb3.13). we're constantly admonsished to pray for each other and i ask for it nearly every day from my friends. why? because Christ is physically present when we are physcially, emotionally and spiritually there for each other, as a part of His Body.

there is life and freedom and power in hearing the words "Your sins are forgiven" by a man in persona Christi and that's why God has allowed us, Man, to share in His role of Mediator, Intercessor, Reconciler and Forgiver. just as there is none who baptizes with water and the Holy Spirit but Jesus Christ (Jn1.33) but we are told to "baptize in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit" (Mt28.19) "in the name [power/authority] of Jesus Christ" (Act2.38), so too are we given the power and authority [right] to forgive and intercess on behalf of Jesus, for Jesus, with Jesus, by Jesus (Jn20.23).

then, of course, there's His Word. yes, Sacred Scripture, but that's only half of it. what Catholics call Sacred Tradition, or as i see it, Jesus' life lived out every Sunday, is what we've been looking at. these Sacraments are physical avenues that Jesus chose to physically give us to physically receive His Physical and Spiriutal blessings.

i'll start off by briefly addressing the idea of the "traditions of men!" and why Catholics aren't rebelling against God by living out the (infallible) teachings of the Church (can Jesus teach error? Mt16.19, Lk10.16-- if they can bind and loose, if Jesus is heard through their words, can it ever be error?).

in Mt15 and Mk7, Jesus was talking to the religious leaders about their traditions (not Scipturally based) that they would do in order to worm their way out of doing the Will of God. and that's the difference.

every Sacrament, every Tradition that the Catholic Church teaches and practices is taken directly from a gift of Grace that God gave us and Christ Himself completed for us-- baptism, confession, marriage, anointing the sick-- all for His glory, all for our growth in relationship with Him (that's not to say that people havent gotten the wrong idea and have taken advantage of the Sacraments as an idea of "fire insurance" ["sinner's prayer"/once-saved-always-saved, anyone?], but that's not official Church teaching).

the Word lived out every Sunday at Mass. Heaven touching earth; angel and saint-- both living and fully alive-- worshipping the God of Creation and His Anointed, side-by-side. that's what Revelations is. didnt you know that? yes, it's history. yes, it's prophecy. yes, it's poetic. yes, it's cryptic. it's also a parallel of how to-- and what happens when-- we worship God through Jesus and His completion of the Shadow of the Spiritual, ie, the Law. (for a more detailed explanation of this ancient idea [is 2000 years considered ancient?] see Dr Scott Hahn's book The Lamb's Supper). now that's a gift-- experiencing Heaven in our bodies now.

i would say His greatest Phsycial Presence (Present), on top of all of that, is His Body and Blood, Soul and Divinity present in all of Its broken-for-us, faithful-submission-to-God glory that is the Eucharist (you might know it as Communion or the Lord's Supper). The Power of God, the One thing that could unite our fallen selves to the Divine, Christ on the Cross, is given to us in pure, unadulterd love, holding nothing back. more than giving us a mere symbol of His Power of and over Death in and by Life, He gives us Himself to eat, to take into ourselves, to receive His Infinite Love and Strength, as a Bride her Bridegroom, for His glory, in rememberance of Him, as our Strength and Shield and Redeemer and Lover and King and Friend.

just as the Jews were required to eat the actual flesh of the sacrificial lamb, so too God loving requires that we eat the Actual Flesh of the Sacrificial Lamb, Who takes away the sins of the world. It's the Bread of Life that came down from Heaven. It's God Himself offering... Him... self... to us for His Life and Love and Power in all of Its glory. It's Jesus Christ in the Flesh!

i think our problem is (as it has always been) a lack of trust. we short-change what God has told us because it's too hard or it's too hard to comprehend. yes, Jesus gave us His Spirit and His Written Word, just as we are His Spiritual Body, but as long as we are physical people, Jesus has also made us His Physical Body which, as He promised, He will always be Physically Present for, "to the very end of the age." (Mt28.20).

so if you hear about anything Jesus gave us (especially Himself) being only spiritual (or even worse, merely symbolic), remember-- He loves us to much to do that.

test run II

the electric boogaloo

VIA EMAIL-- GO!

wow, did u know that u could email urself blogs? well, u do now! (doesnt make too much sense though, given the fact that, since i'm online to email, i'm online to post). but hey, it's cool!

aah, man!

so i noticed that, when i would put www.blogspot.com instead of www.BLOGGER.com, it would take me to a "page not found" page. then i thought, "hey, seems like that's a blogger address ready for the taking!" (in the style of anarbek.blogspot.com, u know). yeah, i tried. no, can't do it. sum-uh-nuh...

and instead of doing another post (and in an effort to write about my life instead of just ideas and all that) i'll talk about my night at work! woo!

when i got back from mexico, i just really didnt want to call in and tell them i was back. just something about working. anyway, i did and my first shift was tonight (tuesday) and i was dreading it as well! just the idea of being overwhelmed by coffee-learning-things and not knowing anyone (doesnt sound like me, does it?). but i prayed and God is cool. not only did He help me manage my ridiculousness but He also set it up that I worked with/got trained by someone i had talked to before and was kinda cool with and the trainer i thought i was going to have (who i didnt really connect that well with previously) showed up later. the coolest part of all this, though, is that during my other-person-training time i got to connect with this guy by joking and stuff, so now, when he trains me tomorrow, we'll be at that cool, "hey, we're cool" stage.

now leave me alone. i got a support letter to hash out (that wasnt a drug reference, i swear! that one was though).

attitude of gratitude

i was looking back at one of Chris's (cwhitler.blogspot.com) blogs "Faith=risk" and it reminded me of this thing i wrote out 10 or so months ago that josh and i were planning on putting in a 'zine that we never got around to writing. i hope u like it!

"walk in the light, as he is in the light"

drugs were a problem as long as i didnt think they were a problem. life gets out of control as long as i think i have it under control. i'm a slave to sin as long as i'm in denial about my sin and i'll never grow through it until i give it to Christ and to my brothers.

"Pray and give thanks in all things...for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus."

God is a pretty funny guy. what seems so backwards to fallen/natural man is the greatest blessing and tool for our relationship with Christ. so being thankful in all circumstances is what God really wants for me as i walk with my Brother and God, Christ. that means God wants me to actually thank him, give him glory and praise, for all the frustrating, annoying, hard and scary times and not just the "isnt life great, look at all i have and have done" moments of joy and reflection. but why does he want that for/from me? how does that help mend our broken relationship with God?

first of all, the mere act of thanking God for feelings of, let's say, frustration/impatience, for example, allows us to accept the fact that we are pissed off or annoyed and don't have Christ's peace. "God, thank you that i feel really agitated right now because my boss won't get off my back." easy enough.

the second thing it does is shows us where our flesh still has control of our lives and hearts, ie, what and where we arent allowing Christ to reign. "Thank you that feeling agitated means i havent learned Christ's patience."

now we are accepting the fact that our feelings arent bad, they are a tool for growth. God's Truth becomes more and more evident to us, thereby it will be more apparent through us as we live our lives of love and point back to Christ.

this is the part where it all comes together and that gratitude will start to feel real. this is the part of growth. this is what Christ is anxiously fidgiting in his seat (at the right hand of the Father) waiting for us to find -- realizing Christ's sovereignty, direction and love in our lives. "And thank you, Lord, that by showing me how i'm not like you, it means that that's where you are going to do some growing in me!"

now it's all back on Christ's shoulders. we just have to walk the Way. the next time we find our selves in a frustrating situation, instead of resorting to our old man, we realize that it is Christ pruning us, molding and shaping us, into his glory. tough times kinda' lose their edge when we see that it's God lovingly teaching us to be like God.

another tool God lovingly gives us, and another example of the way life is truly meant to be lived, is open relationship and community with our Christian brothers and sisters. when we become Christians, when the Spirit of God and Life is born within us, we become new people in a new family. and family is meant to be close (regardless of the way our society has made it appear). "Hey guys, recently Christ has really been showing me how easily annoyed and pissed off i get at people, especially my boss." now, i know my family isnt going to judge me or condemn me because they know what it's like to be human growing to be like God, also. so it allows me to be real and get things off my chest. it also gives me people who i can count on to pray for me, encourage me when things start getting really hard to handle (growing isnt always easy, even when Christ is doing it!) and if i slip up and cuss out my boss (at least mentally, if not physically) i dont have to let my failures eat at me in secret. i can walk in the Light and be free to be me in Christ as i grow to be more like him.

this is where i give a quick shout out to all my family (physical and spiritual) who has been Christ and community to me in prayer, accountability, a mentor, an ear and a friend! life (especially these last 5 months) would have been impossible without every last one of you. thank you, and thank God for you.

let's top it off with one more praise then we'll tie it all together. "Thank you, Brother, that you care enough about me to reveal your life to me, how my flesh doesnt measure up and that you are the only Way to experiencing true Life. Thank you that you want me to have true life with you. thank you that you care for someone who needs as much work as i do."

so basically, God is worthy of our praise because he wants us to live the life we were meant to live, in his image, in his glory and in his love. he gives us the Spirit of Truth and his Word to reveal it to us, shows us the Way to walk it out and grow and gives us the desire for true Life so we will. and he gives us our Christian brothers and sisters so we have physical people to talk to and love on. all praise and glory be to God our Father in heaven, through Jesus Christ our Lord.

Ahh-yeah!

hmmm

You’re St. Justin Martyr! You have a positive and hopeful attitude toward the world. You think that nature, history, and even the pagan philosophers were often guided by God in preparation for the Advent of the Christ. You find “seeds of the Word” in unexpected places. You’re patient and willing to explain the faith to unbelievers. Find out which Church Father you are at The Way of the Fathers!

here's the thing...

...tell me what u think!

yes. you read that right. it's not too hard.

i remember when i had myspace and no one would ever really respond to my blog! i want feedback! what do u think my email is for? why else do i write my thoughts to the world? and how else am i supposed to think about what i think about if no one gives input on what i think about?! think about it!

and for those of u who do... thanks!

(and i know, chris, that you are the first one to even read my blogspot, let alone respond to it, so dont think that that is in response to u leaving a comment. this is for future blog-readers who just dont get it!)

so He says...

the words and examples are taken from Dr. Scott Hahn, from his interview with Mike Acquilina on "Swear to God," named after Dr Hahn's book. i'm taking them and running!

so not only can God not lie b/c of His supreme uprightness, but He cannot lie due to His Infinite Power. if God were to say "John is a dog," then i would have to-- every cell in my body and every fiber of my being, in the full reality of the physical and spiritual-- would have to become that of a dog because all things in all existence must bow in submission to Him. if He states something as such, it is such.

"My Flesh is Real Food and My Blood is Real Drink." (Jn6.55) there's no ambiguity here. Jesus doesnt go on to explain Himself as anything but what He matter-of-factly states like He does everywhere else in the New Testament when He's misunderstood. Just as He is the Temple that housed the Spirit and Presence of God on earth that was destroyed and raised up in 3 days as He states (cryptically, but not symbolic- or figuratively), so too is His Body and Blood, Soul and Divinity mysteriously present in His gift to us, the Eucharist. All of nature, both seen and unseen, must bow down to not only the Words of God, but to the Word of God, no matter how "hard to accept" (v60-66) it may be.

i'd rather risk taking Him seriously and being wrong than short-changing the very Words that came from His mouth.

from me to you

It’s about time we got in line

I’m not here
to attack your church,
but you need to know
that Christ’s Heart hurts.

There’s fear
of vain repetition,
but Jewish Tradition
Jesus was living.

You go to church
and sing your songs,
a few handshakes
and a service not too long

Sounds like a
watered-down Mass to me.
Jesus is our Friend,
but lack of reverence for our King?

We get stuck on
our ten “fave” songs
but reciting a prayer
is all of a sudden wrong?

Jesus will lead us
into all Truth;
led by the Spirit
He’ll give our hearts the proof

Jesus is the Word
in Scripture and Flesh,
but it’s too true—
Scripture alone cane make a mess

There’s a decided lack of
discipleship these days.
Not just convert, but
“make disciples” my Bible says

So if we all started
on the same page
all the confusion
would be laid to waste

If only Christ
had the wisdom
to leave someone on Earth
with the keys to His Kingdom

If only His Bride
was given a leader
who used the Spirit, Scripture
AND history to feed her

Someone to lead
Christ’s army into war
because all of these ronins
our Kingdom can’t afford

How can we survive
without Authority and Structure?
That’s why Christ set the example
of the submission posture

“Not my will,
but Yours be done.”
That means it might not
always be fun

You think you
always have to agree?
No, we sacrifice “self”
for the sake of the Team

The most pressing thing
on Christ’s Heart before death
is that we would be united
to prove He was sent

But it’s more than just
avoiding disunity, man.
We need to passionately charge,
not just stand!

These separate agendas,
or factions, as I call them,
are the “divide and conquer”
that Christ fore mentioned

So who should we follow
in the authority of the Head?
Well, who did Christ lovingly
leave in His stead?

I believe He made
Peter the Point.
And I think Christ knew
who he’d anoint

It’s in the nature of kingdoms
to name successors
and the Church obviously needs someone
to set the measure

I know not every Pope
has been perfect
but that isn’t grounds
for us to reject

something Christ gave us
for our own good—
a way to guide us
when He’s misunderstood

The Early Church
understood this
for example, when the circumcision
issue was laid to rest

Resolution came
and the sides embraced.
They heard Paul’s words,
authority-laced

So if we wont yield
to who He put in charge,
can’t it be said
that our loyalty’s a farce?

We are no longer foreigners
in God’s nation;
a holy people—
and we’re not on vacation!

If we are to bring
God’s Kingdom to light
then in this dark world,
for Truth we must fight

The One Truth
isn’t subject to relativity
“to each his own”—
no recipe for longevity

Witchcraft and rebellion
we’ve all been set free from
So let’s all submit
as citizens of God’s Kingdom!

(by the Spirit through John Rosenbaum)

posted w/o permission!

Saturday, March 24, 2007

Saturday Morning Catechesis: Conversion
Posted by Mickey Addison @ 12:00 AM
I once attended a parish mission where the Franciscan friar giving it was talking about the lack of vocal zeal by some Catholics. He made the remark as part of a running joke during his talk about how his preaching had elicited a boisterous "Amen!" from the back of the room by a recent convert to the Catholic Faith.
When he returned to the topic of zeal again later, I thought I'd throw him a bone after one particularly good point, and let go with a loud, "Amen!" myself. The room chuckled and the good friar turned to face me asking, "Appreciate that did you? Are you a convert?" The room chuckled again, and I merely answered, "No, Father, I'm a cradle Catholic."
"Well, that is a welcome surprise," he retorted, "An Amen! from a Catholic!" He smiled and returned to his homily about the need to conform ourselves to Christ, and to take in the full meaning of Lent.
After some thought about that exchange between me and the good friar, I realized I didn't answer him correctly when he asked if I was a convert. What I should have said in answer to his question is, "Yes, Father. Everyday."
You see, despite the fact that Christ has granted me the grace to be perfect in holiness, I'm just not there yet. I have accepted the Lordship of Jesus Christ, and I have no doubts about my place in the universe, but sometimes I forget to do what I'm supposed to do. That is to say, sometimes I think I know what's best for me and I forget to listen to the voice of our Lord.
That's when I need conversion.
The Catechism of the Catholic Church defines conversion this way: "Conversion requires convincing of sin; it includes the interior judgment of conscience, and this, being a proof of the action of the Spirit of truth in man's inmost being, becomes at the same time the start of a new grant of grace and love: "Receive the Holy Spirit." Thus in this "convincing concerning sin" we discover a double gift: the gift of the truth of conscience and the gift of the certainty of redemption. The Spirit of truth is the Consoler." (#1848)
Conversion is not a discreet activity, it is a continuing process. Some moments are more conspicuous than others, and surely the first time someone recognizes Jesus for Who He truly is has a "significant emotional event," and remembers that moment as their conversion. But giving one's life over to Christ doesn't complete one's conversion, it merely begins the journey.
St Paul, the great evangelizer of the Gentiles, understood that "abiding in Christ" (cf. Jn 15:4) was not a once-and-you're-done sort of thing. He wrote in his letter to the church at Corinth, "No, I drive my body and train it, for fear that, after having preached to others, I myself should be disqualified." (1 Cor 9:27)
St Paul understood that while it is important to accept Jesus Christ as Lord and Savior, it was only the beginning of a Christian's road to Heaven. Conversion must a constant path to holiness throughout one's life. Furthermore, salvation is a guarantee only to those who finish the race, in other words, remain in the friendship of Jesus Christ to the end. Certainly, He will never remove His outstretched hand, but we must cooperate with Him and take His hand. In other words, St Paul taught that we can't earn our salvation, but we can surely loose it.
It's easy to loose our way in our modern world. Our culture is awash with filth and false teachers. Sadly, the cultural revolution in the 1960s and '70s has brought only darkness and pain masquerading as joy. Even the most committed Christian can be confused and make a wrong turn.
Conversion, then, is the singular grace of a loving Father that we recognize our own need for Him and continuously seek Him out. The Sacrament of Reconciliation is a beautiful way to train our hearts to be open to conversion daily. St Paul compared the Christian life to an athlete training for the Olympics, "Every athlete exercises discipline in every way. They do it to win a perishable crown, but we an imperishable one." (1 Cor 9: 25) Just as an athlete has to understand his weakness so to train himself to improve his performance, so we have to name our own sins and seek the grace to overcome them.
In our human weakness, it is easy to loose our way. The Good News is that we are so loved, that no matter how intense the suffering, we can count on the faithful offer of grace for daily conversion.
And each day we re-commit ourselves to abide in Christ, we take one more step closer to eternal life with Him.

Mickey Addison is a career military officer, and has been a parish level catechist and Catholic Scripture Study, Int'l leader. He and his wife have been married for 19 years and they have two children.Copyright 2007, Rosary Army

le Bible

the mass availability of the Bible can only mean two things...
1. Men are without excuse, and
2. When **it hits the fan, those who hold fast to the faith wont be left to themselves but will have somewhere to turn for guidance.

it's a shame how much we dont care right now

mhm, mhm, mhm

yeah, yeah, yeah, the first one, woo hoo

yeah, u read that right. now get off my back!

i've hesitated getting into online mass communication for quite some time. well, as u can see, no more! i have succumbed! u'll never see me on myspace again, but this i can do.

i need to take a nap